Friday, June 22, 2007

Just my thoughts - not a debate

There is something I don't understand about a relatively new practice in America. Anna is such a sweet and innocent child grant it she has her moments but really overall she is still a sweet and innocent child. How can a mother make such a sweet, innocent child cry it out? This seems to be a common trend these days with some mothers and if you are one of them I am sorry I don't mean to offend or start a debate. I just don't understand how or even why this happens.
If you look at it over the course of a persons life they are little and dependent for such a short time. Why do we feel all consumed with making them independent so quickly. I want Anna to feel safe and secure for as long as possible. I want her to know that at any given moment if she needs me I will be there if at all possible. I am hoping that this will lead to a feeling of safety, security and Independence as she grows older. I am going with the build her up instead of knock her down theory. She will learn soon enough in this great big world that not everyone can be trusted and that sometimes we aren't even safe in our own home. She knows that she is well loved and if some look at it like we are spoiling her or catering to her then so be it. I brought her into the world it wasn't her choice it was ours and thankfully God decided to grant her to us. I feel that for a while we should at least make her feel like her world is as close to perfect as we can make it. That doesn't mean that she is let run wild and crazy. She minds very well and even says please and thank you .
No one knows how a child will turn out when they grow up. No one knows if the way they parent is right or wrong. The only thing we do know is what feels right to us and for me nurturing and loving Anna is what feels right. We still rock her to sleep and if she wakes up (which really isn't often) I go climb in bed with her until she goes back to sleep it really works for us. If you feel that leaving your baby in the room to cry / work things out for themselves is right for you then go for it (I guess). Just remember that all things will pass and the time that our children want us to cuddle and snuggle and love on them is so fleeting missing out on a second of it is really a shame. I know all about sleep deprivation! Anna was up every hour and a half when she was an infant probably up until she was 4 months and then up every 3 or 4 after she was about 7 months. We did have that brief period between 4-7 months where she slept through the night (without crying it out) and now finally after getting up at least 1 time a night forever she is finally sleeping through the night most nights. For those of us that don't cry it out there is hope for sleeping through the night hang in there. Your time for sleep will come back soon.
OK so this is just my thoughts on the whole thing it is probably jumpy but I just wanted to get it out. I have been listening to people talk about it a lot lately and it just bothers me. I even had a friend tell me she would do it for me if I wanted her too. No thanks is all I can say!

1 comment:

  1. Hi, nice to meet you......too late for the warning on blogging being addictive, I'm already there!!!!! The potty training went horribly, I will be writing about it when I can stand to think of it again! it wouldn't be so bad but my son will be three in Aug. Thanks for your comments on crying it out, I have done it but it didn't work for me as I couldn't see it out.......now I rock Lola and put her down and just keep going back to her every 5 or 10 mins (thats if I don't nurse her, which is what she wants and gets most of the time!!!)

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