Day 5

She cried and cried! All the way to school she begged me to take her home. I knew if I did take her home that battle would have been lost but the urge to turn that car around was SO strong! I continued down the road and we made it to school. She really started carrying on when we got there and I did our normal routine. I helped her get her stuff up and gave her a hug. I told her I had to go and I practically ran out the door cause the tears were coming down. It breaks my heart that this is so hard on her. I keep asking myself if it is something that I have done that made her need me so much. There is only one other little boy in the class having the same problem that Anna is having. So what causes this problem? What makes one child cry when they are going to school and another delight in it? The only thing that I can see that I have done that would have created this is the fact that she has been with me pretty much all the time. I mean I leave her with a friend every now and again and she goes to church to her class with no problem. But she has never been in daycare and I don't think I would change that just to have her go to school without crying. As a mom I know it is natural to question how we raise our children. To constantly wonder if we are ruining our childs life. Are they going to need therapy because of me? Seriously, all I know is that I can do the best I can and leave the rest up to God. I was listening to this radio program one day and it said something like: You can do better than your parents because you can learn from their mistakes, you can do the best as you see it but then you also have to pray regularly for God to make up for your mistakes to fill in the gaps so to speak. There is NO SUCH THING AS A PERFECT PARENT except for Our Father God! Don't try to be and don't claim to be but lean on Him to heal you and your child from your mistakes! I guess through my attentitiveness with Anna I haven't taught her the independance that she needs to get through this week but I know with my prayers she will make it through. I am going to hold onto that thought with both hands.

Psalm 18:30

³⁰ As for God, his way is perfect;
the word of the LORD is flawless.
He is a shield
for all who take refuge in him.

One Proud Mama

Dancing with Anna!

Being a Mom is so confusing sometimes. It is like a confusing dance (I have never been a good dancer!) that is ever changing! They are growing and changing and we are growing and changing as parents as well. This means that things will be different from one day to the next.

Anna and I have been feeling growing pains lately. That struggle for power. The I am a big girl and I want to do it myself. I try to give where I can and stand firm where I need too. On the flip side of that sometimes I seem to push her to hard. But then I wonder if it is to hard or if it is necessary. See a confusing dance! Y'all tell me I am not alone on the dance floor! Tell me that we will survive and make it to the next step!

Past and Future!

We had a great weekend! Anna looked so pretty for Easter! She had so much fun with all of the activities and the basket and the extra family time. Easter is so much better with a child! Of course, I think most things are just better with a child lol. Before we had Anna all of the holidays and vacations etc were just missing something. Now looking at everything through Anna's eyes just makes everything so exciting and new again. It is the next best thing to being a kid yourself lol.

I don't know why I got off on that tangent lol. I love being a Mommy and it shows I guess lol.

Anyway, This week I am going to start my veggie garden. I am very excited about this. I have never had one before because we have always had big dogs that wouldn't be kind to it. Now I am going to take advantage of the yard we have and plant all sorts of veggies! I have a friend or two that will be coming to help and we are going to work together on all of our yards. (Angel, I ran into Lori at the store this morning and mentioned it. She said she might come help if we help do hers lol.) I can't wait! I will post pictures of course for you guys including a before and after shot. Then ya'll can watch the growing process with us! If anyone has any gardening tips please feel free to pass them on. We are using seeds and I have never done that before!

You know your a Mom when:

you walk out to get something from the car for your daughter in your pjs and with minnie mouse ears on your head.

You dance and sing going through the grocery store and don't think anything of it.

You run around the front yard chasing a laughing 2 year old and can't imagine being any place else.

You go to bed early every night just so you can enjoy snuggling with your little one.

You do things like bake cookies or the dishes with the help of your little person even though you know it will double how long it takes to complete the task.

You miss the days of nursing and snuggling but thrive on the activity of your busy body.

You come to terms with your living room looking like a daycare center 24/7.



Help me out with my list. Tell me what makes you know you are a Mommy!!!